Living in such a materialistic society as we do, it can be hard to even detangle oneself from the mindset of constantly wanting and buying more and more stuff. We have been bombarded with ads from a very early age, from every possible media, telling us why we “need” this that and the other thing. We are told how each of these items will make our lives easier, fuller, more fun, etc., etc. Just the very act of “shopping” has become a leisure time activity in and of itself. We are trained to always want the bigger and better next thing. We compare ourselves to others based on if our stuff is as good, new, and shiny as theirs. We never reach the point of satisfaction because there is always that next best new thing coming out that we have to have, as evidenced by the lines for the newest model iPhone. Really??! Is it that much better than the previous model that you have to waste precious hours of your life waiting on line to have it a few hours (or even days or weeks) earlier than you would have been able to get it otherwise? To me, that represents the epitome of how deeply this materialistic mindset is entrenched in us. And once we get that new thing, how long does the satisfied happy feeling last? Not long apparently as evidenced by all the stuff put out at garage sales (many with tags still on), not to mention Craigslist, eBay, and even worse, into the ever-growing landfills. It is the thrill of the acquisition that is being sought. Once we actually own the thing the joy fades pretty quickly. This just sets us up for wanting more to experience that “high of the buy” once again. As you can see with this type of scenario one can never be truly satisfied and happy. Would you like to get off this unsatisfying and frustrating carousel? I know I do and I make a very concentrated effort in my life to buck the system. It can be hard to do when you are literally surrounded by it, but the better you get at recognizing the pattern and fighting to control being sucked in by it, the happier (not to mention less stressed and richer) you can be. It is when you get out of the “more and better stuff” mindset you truly start to appreciate the things that you have. And ironically the less stuff you have the more you appreciate it. And even more ironically the less you pay for each item the more you appreciate it. I take great satisfaction in having acquired an item for free or very inexpensively that has given me much use or added beauty to my life. The less I spend on something the more I appreciate it, because not only do I appreciate the thing itself, I am also appreciative that it did not take my hard earned money away from me. This can be especially true of items that we tend to collect a lot of, such as clothes. It feels much better to have a few shirts that you really like and enjoy wearing than to have your closets and drawers stuffed with them, many of which you don’t even wear. And if you spent a lot of money on those shirts that you don’t even wear that can make you feel worse. As they say, “Less is more”. It really is true! I take great pleasure in buying a shirt that I really like at a thrift shop for a few bucks (or even better if someone has given it to me for free) and I feel that pleasure each time I wear the shirt. The fact that our world is bombarded with stuff and we can go out to stores filled with it and buy, buy, buy, and now even at home we are bombarded with the urge to buy, buy, buy on our computers leaves us in a state of wanting constant instant gratification. All we have to do is have a thought of wanting something and it can be ours at the swipe of a credit card or click of a button. But has this made us any happier? I would venture to say no. What it has done is deprive us of the joy of waiting for our pleasure. For it is in that anticipation of pleasure that our excitement builds up. If we have to wait for something, then we appreciate it so much more when we finally do get it. Instant gratification has effectively deprived us of that very pleasure. Some people think of trying to live below their means as a painful way to live. They view it as deprivation. But it is all in the mindset of how you approach it. I find that living below my means gives me more pleasure than living the life of constant instant gratification through buying more and more stuff. It is a less stressful, slower, more satisfying way to live. It allows you to savor pleasure more deeply rather than to be constantly looking to acquire the next best thing. I urge you to give the joy of slow acquisition a try. You will be surprised how much pleasure not spending money can bring you. Your life will be less stressful, more peaceful and richer than ever before, I promise!
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Here we are mid-summer, the height of “fun” season, with so many ways to enjoy this glorious time of year. And the myriad of activities at our disposal can run the gamut from free to ultra-expensive. How are you doing so far? Here’s a tip. The amount of money spent does not equate to the amount of fun had. It’s as simple as that. Let’s look at some ways you can have a great summer without breaking the piggy bank, and some alternatives to those activities you are currently forking over oodles of your hard-earned money for. We’ll start with kids who, as anyone who has ever had them in their lives knows, can be a huge drain on your pocketbook. But as the financial savvy among us know, only if you let them. The first thing that comes to mind with kids and summer is camp. This phenomenon alone can empty your piggy bank. The first question that comes to mind is “Do they really need to go?” At the risk of sounding like the old fart that I am, back in my day, we didn’t all get shuffled off to “enriching” summer camps. We just stayed home and played with our siblings and neighborhood friends all summer. And dare I say, used our imaginations and got plenty of exercise to boot. If you still have the need (or desire) to send your kid(s) to camp, there are less expensive, and yes, free options. Look into them. Your little Einstein can have just as much fun at a town or church camp, often run free of charge, then at a fancy “science” (or art, music, sports, etc.) designed primarily to relieve you of your money. Give it some thought before you sign on the dotted line. As for entertaining the little darlings at home (and may I add here that it is not necessarily our job as parents to “entertain” them?), there is no end to the fun things they can do for free or a small layout for materials. There is art (painting, drawing, sculpting, etc.), water play (small backyard pool, water balloons, sprinkler, etc.), backyard games (tag, soccer, hide and seek, red rover, etc.), indoor (board) games for rainy days. Or take them for a bike ride or a hike or a picnic. Get them involved in some gardening. Have them make a little fairy garden. Take them to the library to check out some books and videos or take part in the many free activities offered there. Have a make-your-own sundae party or a campfire and make s’mores. Look around for free family activities in your or neighboring communities. There are often free concerts in the park, street fairs, and other kid-friendly events listed in your local paper. The possibilities for free fun are only limited by your (and your children’s) imagination. Use it! And many of these activities double as adult entertainment too, even for those of you without children in your lives. Bike rides, hikes, picnics, games, campfires, s’mores, ice cream sundaes, and concerts in the park can all be enjoyed by you too. The library is not only a source of free reading material and videos but often also offers programs geared to adults as well, from book clubs to art classes to writer’s groups. There is something for everyone. Again, keep your eyes and minds open to opportunities in your area. Let’s look at some of those things that drain your pocketbook in the summer. I’ve already mentioned concerts. You can find many for free. Even the paid events will often have cheaper outdoor lawn seats available. I much prefer these “seats” anyway as it is very pleasant being outdoors under the stars enjoying the music.
Going out to eat can get costly in the summer months (and always). Why not take turns hosting potluck dinners with your friends at each other’s houses, or take it out to a park or beach? If you just can’t stay away from restaurants, try skipping the appetizers, keeping drinks to a minimum (one or none), sharing an entree, and/or a dessert, or having the dessert when you get home. At least this will keep the cost down to a minimum. And save the eating out for a special occasion. If you do it all the time it loses its specialness and joy anyway. And then, of course, there’s vacation. The cheapest thing to do of course, is not to go on one, or to opt for the ever-popular “staycation”. But if you must go away there are many things you can do to keep the costs down. Staying for a week at a place with a kitchen will cut your meals budget. Going in on a place like this with friends will cut the cost even further. And just as I suggested at home, look for free activities in the area. You can always go on their town’s website in advance to check out the calendar of events. If you don’t want to rent for the week, you can try house-swapping, either with people you know (to check out a new place with in-the-know references as to what is good to do), or through a house swap registry. Some other tactics to save money would be to go on a shorter vacation (do you really need a whole week away?) Try this midweek to save even more. And always be sure to use any discounts you have available, AAA, AARP, Groupon, discount coupon books, etc.) And as for those money intensive kids on vacation, make sure to give them a budget ahead of time. It might be a good idea to provide them with their own vacation fund (for treats, souvenirs, etc.) ahead of time. When it’s gone it’s gone. It’s up to them how long they make it last. This doubles as a good lesson for them for future budgeting (wink, wink). Here’s to enjoying the glorious bittersweet last month of summer. Keep the activities simple and on-budget and you can look back on your delightful summer with no regrets and no debt, only fond memories to treasure forever. Did you spring clean your finances? Were you able to take a good look at your expenditures and trim some of the fat out of your monthly expenses? If you have done this successfully, I bet you are feeling pretty light right now. In fact, you are probably walking around with a spring in your step! It’s amazing how good lightening up your budget can make you feel! Before people start on this process they actually tend to think that putting themselves on a tighter budget will make them feel weighed down and restricted, but once they get started they realize that it actually has quite the opposite effect.
And once you have pushed past those first steps, you will find not only does it feel surprisingly good, but it gets easier. And not only does it get easier, but you get better at it. That frugal muscle begins to awaken and gain strength. And, by golly, not only is saving money not a chore, but it begins to become fun! You will start to examine each expenditure in a new light. You will find yourself looking for more ways to save. How can you cut back even further? Once you come out of that fog or never-ending consumerism your brain chemistry will begin to change. You will no longer take your satisfaction from acquiring more and more stuff and making all those daily instant pleasure purchases, but rather in the feeling of pride and contentment that you are living a full life without needing to spend money like that. As you gain control over your finances, get out from under that heavy debt, and begin to see your savings grow, you will delight in the peace of mind that your new frugal lifestyle has brought you. “Stuff” is no match for this joyful feeling of gratification. This will strengthen your resolve to save even more. Once you get the “snowball” going in the right direction there’s no stopping you! Who wants to go back to being buried under that avalanche of debt and stress.? You are free! Now you will stop and think about each purchase with what I call the Super Sliding Scale of Savings. It goes something like this:
The more times you can make it all the way to step 6, the better off you will be and the happier and more content you will become. So keep on flexing that frugal muscle! You will continue to grow stronger financially and lighter in your outlook and step. Here’s to financial fitness! |
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